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Monasticism and Asceticism (part I)

I want to begin by reminding myself of something said in the sermon by our college chaplain on Tuesday night; As church leaders we are the most at risk of temptation to boast of spiritual achievements (see 2 Corinthians 12). Having said that I will add that I tell you about the intense couple of days I have just had, not to boast, but to share and document what God was saying to me through the experience.

Now that disclaimer has been issued…

‘The Monastic Ball of Intensity’ (T.M.B.I.)(see Wrestling With Truth (part III)) and I have talked for some months now about reading Isaiah straight through out loud; we wanted to listen to the whole narrative as it flows. As the term went on and things filled our diaries, we found ourselves in the last weeks with very little time during the day to take on this exercise. We decided that it would be ‘cool’ to do it at night and ‘up the stakes’. As we talked about it the descriptive words used by both of us became less ‘interesting, useful’ and more ‘endurance, intense, hardcore, ascetic’ and we started to run away with ideas of doing an all night spiritual marathon with prayers and disciplines added on.

The final decision was: after the college communion on Tuesday night we would do Compline (Night Prayer) and start at chapter one. We would take alternate chapters and/or rotate through whoever came and joined us. We would light some candles and have a simple cross to help our focus but the main task was to listen and digest the words of ‘the great prophet’. We would stay up all night and fast in the chapel as we read and when we came to the end of Isaiah we would decide on another prophet (perhaps Ezekiel) and read through until we got to about 6.00am when we would read Morning prayer and prepare ourselves for a quiet day on Holy Island, organised by our college for the students.

And so at 10pm on Tuesday T.M.B.I., myself and three other students sat in chapel and said Compline together by candle light. We then went straight into Isaiah, chapter 1, verse 1: ‘The vision concerning Judah and Jerusalem that Isaiah son of Amoz…’

During the evening we stopped and prayed for different things, we repeated verses that struck us as important, we knelt in quiet meditation. People came and went and by chapter 40 it was T.M.B.I. and I, one kneeling the other reading. The whole experience was intense, amazing and exhilarating. The sleep deprivation, although visible in my eyes was not felt in my spirit. I was buzzing as we head into the final chapters. God’s presence was so tangible; one person who joined said that as he walked in the place was heavy with holiness… but I’m heading too close to boasting of my experience.

At 2.30am, we had completed Isaiah and moved to our common room to reflect on what we felt God saying through the reading. The only word I could use was ‘relentless’. Isaiah, gives you no break from the anger of God, the passion for His people and, through it all, His almighty mercy. Hope is splattered through the whole book but always the background of depravity and darkness; specks of light break through blackness. T.M.B.I. commented on the ineffability of the text, all we can truly hold is the emotional response to the ‘relentless’ narrative of this relationship of God and his people. We were all struck, I think, by the importance of repentance for sin, not to cheapen grace and forgiveness and, most importantly, not to tame God! What does confession of sin and repentance look like in a theatre setting? I have some ideas already brimming, need to capture the truth of them…

T.M.B.I. went to bed after an hour and a half of chatting and I went back and read Acts, a perfect complement to Isaiah. I was struck by the Spirit (which I will not speak of) and it came as a drenching after an academic year where I have rarely been fed as deeply. When it got to 5.30am I started Morning Prayer, alone in the chapel.

Afterwards, I went, got washed and changed and went to meet a group of guys who I have prayed with over this year. I was flying, it was amazing… I can hardly describe it. The prayer session was fantastic and I’m so grateful for those guys who have supported and ministered to me and for whom have allowed me to support them in times of vulnerability.

And then on to Holy Island…

The home of St Cuthbert, ‘Durham’s Saint’, for many years, Lindisfarne is a place that knows monasticism! After a brief reflection in the church there I went for a solitary walk to some beach. As I sat I asked God to speak and sum up what happened the previous night. I was drawn to Peter Brooks’ chapter on Holy Theatre in ‘The Empty Space’ which now lives, again, constantly in my bag. He writes,

‘he himself was always speaking of a complete way of life, of a theatre in which the activity of the actor and the activity of the spectator were driven by the same desperate need… Artaud applied is Artaud betrayed: betrayed because it is always just a portion of his thought that is exploited, betrayed because it is easier to apply rules to the work of a handful of dedicated actors than to the lives of the unknown spectators who happen by chance to come through the theatre door.’

What a powerful way of describing the work of any prophet. I sat and thought about what I had heard the night before from Isaiah. ‘Isaiah applied is Isaiah betrayed’ for the exact same reason as it was for Artaud. Brook also says,

‘…maybe the power of his vision is that it is the carrot in front of our nose, never to be reached.’

I’m not sure about the ‘never to be reached’, in Isaiah’s case, but certainly not within the limitations of this fallen world. Isaiah’s vision is always out of reach in completion but that we grasp one thing and then another thing is brought into focus. I shared this thought with T.M.B.I. and he came out with a gem only he could say,

‘That’s why we have to stay mad!’

I wonder if he knew Artaud as the man who died with one shoe in his hand, in an asylum?

That would be a nice completion of my post today but… in true Isaiah fashion I will carry on!

As I stood on Cuthbert’s Island, a little clump of land which becomes an island at high tide, I heard the seals wailing. The sound was so powerful. It sounded like the screams of demons or of a damage generation. High on sleep deprivation and coming off an epic reading of the prophet, I imagined Cuthbert stood in prayer hearing the seals wailing, in the distance the mainland. What a powerful prayer tool! God called me to pray for this country and the emotional screams that echo through our land. I desperately wanted something to have as a reminder of that meeting with God and I went into the shops to buy some memento… it was all tat!

Hope was at hand. Friends of mine were making a visit to the Northumbria Community and I was keen to have a look at this way of life and to buy some spiritual aid. I have heard so much about this community over the last year and was intrigued about the nomadic nature of the community and how we, in the theatre world may use the framework.

When we arrived it was a lovely farmhouse, homely and welcoming. The people were awesome and very hospitable, which is good because it’s part of their Rule. I looked at their prayers and studied the literature they use and was dissatisfied. For me (and it is a very personal thing!) their liturgy and the focus of the community was a little too ‘hippy’ for me, too alternative. If anyone has gone to Greenbelt before and found some of the religious stuff too ‘60s love and peace’ then this place is not a religious home for you. Having said that, the welcome and peace around the house is wonderful and I can see, if you want a place to rest, then this is ideal. I just wouldn’t be signing up to read their Morning Prayer every day with a very earthy and ‘hippy’ mentality. This all sounds cruel, it’s not! I can’t describe what it is about the literature I saw but I accepted it wasn’t for me, although I would praise the theory behind it. The work of this community is important and, for others, will be a real home, but for me it isn’t.

What then of a monastic styled community for the theatre? What of a rhythm of prayer for actors who travel (see Riding Lights Theatre Church post)? I have started a conversation with a Fransican friend of mine, we shall call her ‘The Mother’ (not sure what she’d say to that but she has a great maternal instinct and it has slight religious connotations!). She follows the Fransican Rule and as I spoke to her this morning she spoke about the ‘fool for Christ’. I will speak more to ehr about it before offering embryonic thoughts…

How to end in Isaiah fashion? Chapter 66, verse 23 and 24:

‘“From one New Moon to another and from one Sabbath to another, all mankind will come and bow down before me,” says the LORD. “And they will go out and look upon the dead bodies of those who rebelled against me; their worm will not die, nor will their fire be quenched, and they will be loathsome to all mankind.”’

Relentless, isn’t it?

A Brief Explanation (part III)

Spent last night reading Isaiah, from start to finish. Why? Why not!

I then went straight on to a prayer session with a group of friends and then onto a quiet day at Holy Island, it’s been an amazing time but I’ve had 15 minutes sleep in 40 hours so now would not be the best time to write a deep reflection on it.

Watch this space.

Wrestling With Truth (part VII)

Currently heading down to London to ‘celebrate’(?) one of my best friends stag do. I’m travelling there and back in a day, which means I have over 8 hours on a train… Just enough time to write some thoughts and reflections on the Durham Mysteries 2010 which I saw last night.

In order to comment and reflect on what I witnessed last night I should outline my understanding of Mysteries cycles. The concept dates back to medieval England where professional theatre was not understood and the theatre was done by the Church. The earliest forms were extensions or visual depictions of liturgical text; as these were often Latin it helped to engage the common people who couldn’t read (English or Latin!) The Pope in the 13th century then banned clergy from acting in public and the mysteries, now a regular event on festival days, was handed over to guilds and crafts to oversee.

The Durham Mysteries were organised and created by Simon Stallworthy, Artistic Director of the Gala Theatre, Durham. He wanted to make this cycle as truthful to the original cycles of medieval England in organisation and style, and the fact that he is not part of the church system aids this comparison. After the Pope banned involvement in mysteries for the clergy, the guilds and crafts took charge and in so doing lost some of the theological understanding of the texts and stories. The problem with this modern adaptation was the same. These modern retellings, however, unlike medieval England where the stories and images were still relatively common and were learnt by most of the population, in 21st century Durham, are alien. Stallworthy comments,

‘Greek, Elizabethan, Restoration and Victorian drama are still a staple of our repertoire, because we are exploring the same questions and looking for similar answers.’

I would agree, but the Mysteries need a different approach. The questions asked may still be the same but in the original Mysteries there was an implicit framework in which to ask and wrestle with those questions. There was an understanding of God, what He is like, without this then you can come to conclusions about God which are not true although they may be logical.

The creative people involved in responding to the biblical stories were, from the product they showed, not all from a Christian background. This is (and I want to stress this) not, necessarily, a problem. Those outside the Christian faith can speak, prophetically into our understanding of God and challenge aspects of our faith but it is dangerous to presume that their understanding of Scripture is healthy and/or godly.

What do I mean? Well take the some examples from last night. A god who demands praise and sacrifice in order to gain a boost in his ego. A god who has to be told that he must love the world He created by angels and/or humans. A god who on His ‘day off’ goes to have a look at his world and hates all that he sees. A god who can’t be bothered to look after or guide His people. This is not God. The early plays in Durham mysteries were created, from what I saw last night, by people who have little understanding of the whole story or of the things involved. The Mysteries of the 10th to 16th century were grown out of guilds and crafts who had an established understanding of the Christian story and often spoke prophetically into the theology of the Church. Some of the plays last night had lost the prophetic because they lacked an understanding of the God who was involved in these stories.

Having said all this, once we started the steps towards Jesus, starting at ‘Abraham and Isaac’ through to the ‘Harrowing of Hell’, then God was someone I could get on board with. The depiction and understanding of Christ was profound. The questions asked in the latter parts of the cycle were important. Christ is still the way most people understand God. This is great news! Why is it, then, that most people understand Jesus but can’t believe in the God of the Old Testament? Certainly, there’s a deep assumption that the God of the Old Testament is all angry and disappointed and the God of the New Testament is loving and kind, but I think this is the heart of the issue.

I spent two days this week in a primary school and during my time I watched a very good assembly. The teacher was asking about having God/Jesus with us when we are facing difficulty and the joy and peace of being in relationship with Jesus. At other times, however, I was struck by the simplistic description of the Christian faith. You may be thinking, “But Ned, they’re only children.” I think we underestimate our children if we do not think they can handle an understanding, for example, of painful sacrifice, of difficult decisions, of accepting our weaknesses. What is the Christian message? One of triumph and success? One of we can all get on if we try harder? At the very heart of our message is that we let go of all we are and die to ourselves, our wants, our comforts. This is a tough message but, I say again, we underestimate our children if we do not think they can handle this lesson.

It makes me question how we teach the faith; how we tell our story to those outside of the faith. People get Jesus because he is some perfect guy who loves and is tolerant but, actually, he isn’t. We need to see the whole story. How tolerant is Jesus? God is the same yesterday, today and tomorrow, and God can seem harsh, strict and angry in the Old Testament but actually, he is still love. We need to ask that difficult question; How is the Old Testament God ‘love’?

The final five plays of the cycle were powerful retellings of the biblical story and asked profound questions. As a Mysteries Cycle, Durham Mysteries was a success. It gathered together the communities of the North East. It was profoundly local, in it’s content and approach. There was a real sense of celebration of the local culture and heritage and the language was colloquial and contemporary. All it needed was someone who could ask those important questions of the creative team behind the earlier plays to help tell the true and real story and to show everyone the God of creation and love in Genesis.

I pray that in 2013, when the next cycle is performed, that God will send His people to help people engage with the real story and that God’s glory will be shown and many will come to know their part in ‘his story’.

(Sorry for the final pun)

The Magician’s Nephew

Prior to the Cathedral event on Sunday I went to help some friends paint their house in Leeds. Travelling up the A1(M) as the sun set to the left of us, my wife and I listened to Kenneth Branagh read C.S. Lewis’ ‘The Magician’s Nephew’. It’s been ages since I read the prequel to his more popular and famous books in the Narnia series. I was enjoying the my trip down memory lane when all of a sudden a felt that heart tug when I realised this story was speaking to me about ministry.

In the early chapters Digory and Polly stumble upon a secret and forbidden study of Uncle Andrew, a self made magician who had discovered some magic powder to transport people to another world. He had developed two types of rings, one yellow and one green. He tricks Polly into holding the yellow ring which transports her out of this world and into the new world. Digory is left with his uncle. His uncle tells his nephew that the only way he was to see Polly again was if he travelled into the new world with her green ring that will bring her back to this world.

So what?

As Digory and his uncle discuss the merits of travelling into the unknown to collect Polly, Digory begins to realise that Uncle Andrew was too scared or cowardly to travel into the unknown himself but wants all the praise and congratulations if the trip is successful. He keeps himself safe while encouraging others to take a risk. This really encouraged me in my wrestlings with theatre and ministry.

I’m currently standing in the Uncle Andrew position; talking and imagining this new world. I have the way marked out and all I need to do is grab hold of the yellow ring and see what happens. I have even got a green ring, in the shape of boundaries marked out, if this community doesn’t work out. In order to discover the joys and/or the troubles someone needs to grab the ring. C.S. Lewis clearly believes that it is cowardly for Uncle Andrew not to take the risk upon himself and instead gets two children to be his ‘experiment’. I refuse to implement any other person in my ‘experiment’. I need to be Digory and step into the unknown in order to collect my friends.

Unlike Uncle Andrew, Polly and Digory, however, someone has been to this place before, someone is there waiting. I still need to take the risk and just jump into the world and discover what it holds but I also need to remember that God is waiting and has the story thought out.

When Digory arrives in ‘the wood between the worlds’ he discover it’s a portal to all sorts of different worlds and the jumping into one world actually becomes only the start of his risk taking and adventure. I wonder what adventures this one jump will bring. In making this first step I’m opening up a different ministry of exploring new worlds and new challenges. I feel, at the moment, I have the courage and passion for adventure of Digory but, like Digory, I need to also remember to mark out the pool which leads home.

Cathedral Event


I was involved in a contemplative, informal, space exploring evening at Durham Cathedral last night. This event has been embryonic for the last six months or so and it was exciting to see its first outing. The night was a ‘rehearsal’; however, this was a strange concept in itself. How can you rehearse a service? God is there, present in the sacrament (which was shared).

Michael Volland has written a post on it on his blog.

The night was useful in that it served its purpose of showing us what worked, where God moved strongly and areas that need more prayer and reflection. I’m loathed to share my personal reflections at this time (see Theatre Church (part II)). All that needs to be said is that this is an exciting team to be a part of and there was real potential in areas of the evening. Lots to consider to make it honest and true to its calling but God is moving and answered prayer.

On a personal note, it confirmed a passion for Fresh Expressions and creating spaces in which people can encounter Christ and to subvert previous conceptions of church and bring many to know the personal Saviour… We didn’t fully reach this ideal last night but, after some constructive reflection, we may yet grasp the full reality God has in store.

Exciting times!

I will add more later when the group has discussed the evening.

Theatre Church (part III)

As things start to fall into place with my placement and the boundaries are marked up to protect myself and those who will be involved, I’m starting to ask a question of this blog.

How much do I journal the progress of this community?

The internet is a public space and, although, looking over to how many followers I have, I see not many people read this; the people who will be involved deserve privacy and confidentiality.

What then will the purpose of the blog be?

Why did I start writing? To journal my thought journey as I wrestled with what God wanted me to do. This has been really helpful to help me reflect on my ministry and on the shaping of the placement next year. The reason for making this a public journal was to try and gather other people’s views and ideas and allow those to shape me as well. This has also been really helpful. I have had chats with people about things raised in my blog which have helped me to fine tune my thoughts and ideas, that have encouraged me and discouraged me from going off on the wrong path.

Do I still need to journal my thoughts in a public space? Certainly the theological reflections on theatre in ministry still require other people’s perspectives and suggestions for further reading, etc. The placement cannot, however, remain public, due to the sensitive issue of protecting those involved. But there will be times when the activity and development or the struggles and disasters of the community next year will need reflection and I will need those chats with people to help me through.

This is raises questions about the nature of blogging. I don’t want this space to be me advertising everything that’s going on in my life but rather a space where I can communicate and mark where my reflections on theatre and ministry are up to. I need, therefore, to make sure that this space (the blog) is restricted to ambiguous and theological reflections, be that inspired from lectures or books or videos or whatever or inspired from the community next year. This is not a space where I publish all the news and personal journeys of those involved in the community.

Undergirding this questions, as well, is the thought of people involved in the community will be able to, if they look for it, to read these posts. Although nothing is hidden from them and they will be aware of my approach and purposes, is not a bit weird that they will have access to my hopes and fears and personal reflections? Is that a bad thing?

I wrote a couple of sentences for my tutor to have that will help him and I understand the aims of next year’s placement. Here it is:

To create a community in which its members can explore their story and ask questions of faith in a safe, vulnerable space through theatre and character exploration. To meet twice a week and direct them through a yearlong rehearsal process and produce public performances that do not mark the end of a process but mark the journey on its way.

If I am creating a space that is safe and vulnerable, yes I will need to keep issues private but they will need honesty, vulnerability and openness from me. This leads us nicely to what I think is at the heart of this question; is there a need for leaders to hide pain and brokenness from those they are leading? The leaders I respect most are those who communicate honesty and integrity but if they disclose too much then they, somehow, lose respect for me, they lose power in the relationship and then it’s harder for them to lead or discipline. Can you, as a leader, be honest and vulnerable around those you are leading?

I’ll leave you with that and ask that you take your right to comment and shape my thinking.

Impossipuzzle

What do you do when all your work is done and you have a week to breathe and start to relax?

Do a jigsaw called ‘Impossipuzzle’.

I love to do jigsaws… with a blanket over my knee and my denture soaking in a cup of water! I know that the analogy of a jigsaw and life with God has been done before but it has really struck me how, whilst doing this jigsaw, I have been trying to piece together what God wants me to do in preparation for next year’s placement.

When I started this jigsaw I had a vague sense of what it was of (I don’t look at the cover, it’s more exciting then!) but it was only after I had started and got pieces in place that the pattern became clear. It’s so satisfying when you find the piece that fits and even more exciting when you get lots of pieces fitting in quick succession. It’s frustrating, however, when you cannot find the piece you’re looking for. You try every piece (or at least you think you do) but none of them fit. Is the jigsaw incomplete? Have you lost the piece on the floor or under the sofa? Chances are you’ve not study the pieces close enough.

It’s the same with fitting together this placement. I have a vague sense of what it may look like but as I put things in place and start mapping out the framework I see a clearer direction and focus. It’s satisfying when things fit together, you meet just the right person at just the right time. Sometimes these things happen in quick succession and then there’s a huge gap and you can’t seem to see the next step forward. You question whether you’ve lost your way, or this is not the direction you’re meant to go in. Like the jigsaw piece, you’ve probably not study the pieces close enough.

This week as I try and make preparations for the start of next term, before students head off on holiday, I’ve faced gaps in the vision. The first was a supervisor.

What’s a supervisor for? To speak into and support the placement. This needs to be someone who will open my eyes to things going on outside of my bubble, who will critique and oversee the work. It needs to be someone who has experience of this sort of ministry and who will be there if and when I panic. My tutor has experience of this sort of work and will inevitably support and encourage me, critique my ministry and have a prophetic element to the community. He can’t, however, remind me of the world outside of college as he is part of that and has associations for me. I asked him for his advice and he happened to have had lunch with a guy in Durham that day who has also had experience in community building and Fresh Experiences and was a professional story teller. God’s timing and guidance, or what!

The second gap was a confirmation that I’m being called into Pioneer Ministry. This is a strange gap to have but whilst I happily prepare for next year’s placement, jumping from excitement to sheer anxiety, I have forgotten the practical excuse for doing this at college. The excuse is different from the reason but both are valid. The reason is because I feel called to the theatre community here in Durham and potentially in the future. The excuse, which I need in order to be given time to do it, is to test my vocation in Fresh Expressions.

What would a confirmation of Pioneer Ministry look like? I would like to suggest a clear confirmation would be to have someone come up to me and call me a ‘pioneer’. What is a pioneer?

‘We’re looking for people who combine Christian maturity with a concern for those outside the Christian community; ministers who are willing to learn as they go, try new things and have the vision and skills to develop new communities who do some things differently.’ (Steve Croft, How Do Pioneers Learn?)

This week as I have been praying for a reliance on God and renewed vision for what I’m doing here, I have had one person come up to me and affirm my vision and creative approach to ministry, I have had another person who envied my ability to be shaped by new understanding and learning, and one other person who actually called me a ‘pioneer’ (we were discussing my questions over my gifting for next year…so it doesn’t really count. Shame!) Throughout it all many people have been passionate about the possibility of next year and, although no one can walk the journey with me, i feel really supported by the community.

As I finish the week, having stepped a few more pace down the path marked out for me, I’m aware of the loneliness of this style of ministry and the risk but of equal measure the support, love and prayers of a whole cloud of witnesses; to tip the balance a pleasure and delight of God bursts my questioning bubble again and again and I take each step holding the hand of my Father.

I finished the puzzle tonight! Nothing is impossible, it seems, when you have endurance and take things one piece at a time.

Wrestling With Truth (part VI)

I love theatre…just thought I should exclaim that.

The wife and I had the great pleasure of being invited to go and see ‘The Count of Monte Cristo’ at the West Yorkshire Playhouse by my sister and her partner. WY Playhouse, for me, is renowned for high quality, fresh and innovative theatre. I have longed to see a show at this venue for many years but never made it. I was excited as we travelled down the A1(M) heading towards the familiar busy and complicated roads of Leeds.

As we sat in the courtyard theatre, with traditional red curtains covering the stage and equally conventional footlights, I was struck by how, woven in with these forced traditions were glimpses of 21st century living, ‘birdies’ (a small spotlight) were nestled into the footlights and Mumford and Sons playing in the background. All of this, despite being, on the face of things, ‘old hat’ established a strong atmosphere for this adaptation of a classic.
Lots of things in this show were strong and successful but there two things to note here.

The first one is the writing. Joel Horwood, the adapter of the show, has done an excellent job here. In my previous life as a director (if I can call it that now) I specialised in classic texts and often struggled to get good adaptations and translations. Bringing a classic into the ‘here and now’ is difficult and Horwood has done this subtly and successfully. The language, at times, was rooted in the style of the book but beautifully knitted into this language was the language of ‘Skins’ (for which Horwood writes). The script rapidly runs with ease and smoothness between the traditional and the 21st century that marks this script out as superb.

The role of an adapter/writer is really important for theatre and it should be in the Church. The script is really central to successful theatre and in churches, when wanting to do sketches, etc., they rush the script writing and the time is not spent on this. To lead worship, you need both gifted musicians but this means nothing if the songs are not written well. The same is true of theatre worship. Actors are important but if the script is poor it means nothing. Adapting the Bible for performance needs to have an understanding of the text but also of the theatre. Too often the Biblical text is known but not how to translate the story telling to the stage. This is something that artists like Horwood can offer the church in their worship.

The second point that needs to be raised is that of the overt Christian themes in the play. Having not read the 1200 page book I don’t know how clear this theme comes through but Horwood and Alan Lane (the director) have chosen to focus on it in particular. “I began to think about how as much as the story is about revenge, it’s also about forgiveness, and the nature of religion, and specifically Christianity.” Horwood comments, “…Edmund Dantes basically becomes an extremist; he becomes a Christian fundamentalist, and that’s a story that is fascinating to tell in today’s climate.”

The same idea and belief was commented on by Peter Brook as he explained why he wanted to tell
the story of two fundamentalists who struggle for tolerance and discover sacrificing their very life is the way to freedom. These two plays, both excellently executed, are a sign that theatre can express what society is wanting to communicate but struggling to find the way and the words. God’s gospel and Truth were vibrating through both texts and their delivery. At the back of the stage throughout the majority of Count of Monte Cristo was the three words ‘God is Love”. I was fascinated by this choice. It was unclear whether this was trying to be ironic or if it was drawing from Edmund’s Dantes religious call a stark comparison that should him to be a violent fundamentalist rather than truly Christian. I think and hope it was the latter.

This play was a great example of how theatre can be used as an evangelistic endeavour of telling stories of God whether biblical or secular. It showed God present in life and, despite the seeming decline of Christianity in Britain, speaking and moving and calling people to Himself. That’s why I love the theatre!

I’m left with one question, however…

Did this play need the Church to speak of the reality of forgiveness and its power, to remind people that the God seen and felt in this performance was real, alive and yearning for relationship? Does society to hear this? No… Let’s rephrase that… does society need to hear this? Rhetoric! What a wonderful tool!

Theatre Church (part II)

Interrupting my reading of ‘Why Men Hate Going to Church’ was a thought about my placement next year.

The end of term has peeked its head over the horizon with part of everyone jumping up and down and another half dreading the looming deadlines that go along with it. As we all suffer from a kind of split personality the basic truth stares us in the face; it’s another round of ‘big change’! Some of our community will be leaving and new comers will be arriving. Stuck in the middle of mourning and welcoming are those of us staying (some, like me, will do this again next year). What do we do with our summer?

For me, certainly, I will need to prepare for next year’s placement. It has been almost six months in the praying stage and it seems it’s finally time to make some positive actions. But how do you successfully transfer theory into practice?

Last time, I laid down some possible avenues for action; a resourcing of future ministers of the church and discussing a large scale resourcing via Riding Lights Theatre Company. I discussed with the Administrator at college a time to run a workshop on drama worship… there’s no time! Do I leave this for next year? I think it is an important task and something I should be looking at doing; making sure that my fellow students feel they can use drama effectively and not either shy away from it or overuse it. The other avenue will need to wait til Riding Light’s Theatre Summer School at the end of July.

These avenues, however, are not productive in the new community I feel called to oversee. How do you call people to join a community? I don’t want to feel like I have to do a big marketing scheme (somehow it lacks God fingerprints!) nor do I want to just passively wait for people to guess that’s what I’m doing. The balancing act has begun. I will need to push for some sort of space or time to openly invite anyone who wants to come along. I need to be clear and honest about the intention and yet make it open and flexible for others to bring what they need to bring. What space or time would suit the drama community here in Durham?

After Any Given Friday, I had a chat with some of the actors involved. We talked about the nature of rehearsals in the Durham Student Theatre group; the fast turnaround, the lack of momentum in experiences and the quickly made quickly passed relationships. What is God wanting me to introduce to this already packed market?

Space and Time.

For me, the process of rehearsal is where the most spiritual and profound discoveries are made. It is in the vulnerability of the rehearsal room that an actor and director make fresh discoveries about themselves and each other. This space needs to be a place of vulnerability and trust. This cannot be made in a short period of time with actors who are not fully committed to each other. Therefore for me to facilitate deep discoveries for these actors, to give them time to reflect on themselves and their story, I need to introduce a space and the time for a committed group of actors to meet and ‘play’.

To set up a theatre company or not to set up a theatre company, that is the question?

The negative to doing this is the connotation for production rather than process. If I do set up a ‘theatre company’ then I need to be extra clear as the purpose of its creation; to be a committed company with longer rehearsal times and continuation of process. I need to contrast it with the current theatre companies in Durham by highlighting a year long process of discovery and exploration. Yes, we will produce work but the work will stem from the process rather than the process necessary for the production.

The other negative to doing this is a personal one. Do I want to set up a theatre company because I know how to do it? Is this me running off shouting back to God “I know how to do this. I’ll meet you when I get stuck!” Or am I going into this with God? I think a theatre company would give stability and commitment for the actors and will give them a framework in order to explore, acting like a playground in which to play but is this what God wants?… the million dollar question!

Thinking back to ‘11&12’ (see Wrestling with Truth (part VII)) I am really keen to take the work I was doing in the theatre, which stems from Peter Brook’s work (naturally), and use it here. The techniques and theories I was developing in my personal processes of direction do lend themselves, in part, to exploration of faith. I have not seen the style of theatre that I produce here in Durham and I think people will be interested in trying a new style. Just because I see a ‘gap in the market’ does that mean it’s a God thing? Not necessarily but it’ll be worth trying and praying as I do so that God will quickly close doors and guide me.

Over the summer, therefore, I will be planning and preparing workshops on different practitioners (see Any Given Friday (part VII)) and I can feed into these sessions a call to anyone who wants to do some exploration and coming on board to commit to a theatre company that will be doing interesting and innovative work.

Just a final thought… I may try and adapt ‘The Flood’ by David Maine, which I did for some scenes at the start of my time in Durham. A modern telling of Noah.

Too Christian?

Consolidation and Basic Principles


As I travel back up to Durham I can see the sun setting and flashing colours across the sky. Great worship has led me to re-appreciate the God who created us. I have spent tonight in the wonderful company of a community in York, who started life as a Pioneer Fresh Expression led by a colleague at college. The community has started to consolidate and grown from an outreach into an established community. It’s great to see a storng community which started off by one man and his God now heading towards maturity.

I was invited to go and speak to them about the vision for theatre and church. In preparation for it I had to consolidate what I’ve been wrestling with over the last couple of months. This is such an important stage in any journey and ministry. When I arrived i had no idea which part of my thoughts would ‘hit home’.

It turned out that what I spent most of the time discussing is how theatre can be used in church as worship. This surprised me because most of my thoughts have been about how theatre does church not how can church do theatre. The congregation were a varied bunch some with no or little experience of ‘real’ theatre and others, who I know, that have huge amounts of knowledge.

I started by telling my testimony and a brief explanation of why I am like I am. Then moved onto talking about theatre in worship and why churches shouldn’t do theatre for the sake of doing theatre. I offered an understanding of gifting in the Chruch and how we shouldn’t treat theatre/drama any less than playing music or preaching or counselling. You need the gifts to go with the ministry. I talked about being honest with what God has gifted you in and how best He wants to use them.

I then offered them a suggestion of how theatre can be used in worship and performed a scene from the Noah service I ran at the beginning of term… (I haven’t published that blog post on this website, have I? If you’re interested I can send it to you. You jsut have to ask!) I led into it by getting them to question what they thought the Noah story was about for them, to start asking questions of the basic teaching of the story in order to find life for them. The worship band sang two songs and I entered the space as Noah. I performed a scene on the ark where Noah has gone through with what God asked and now he’s been left with the silence of God. Noah is a broken man and is struggling to understand what was going on. At the end of the story the band led into another song where people had a chance to just sit and reflect and listen to God and how he may have spoken to them.

Apart from the lack of deep praying and planning about the choice of songs I think the demonstration was useful and powerful. One lady approached me and opened up to me about her struggles which she had been spoken to from the worship. I think people, generally were led to a deeper understanding of the story and how God might be working in their own lives. It was great to try out this sstyle of worship with theatre and made me think about how far this can be used.

One question that did come up was how do churches experience this without any ‘trained’ actors? It’s great if you have the gifts but what if you don’t? The same applies to musicians. Someone may be able to play an instrument but it doesn’t mean they can lead worship. There are, also, some churches that don’t have ‘good’ musicians, how do they sing out praises and get led into worship? When it comes to music, my answer would be you don’t need to have live musicians. If the musicians you have are more of a distraction than a help then use a CD or simplify (I’m not a musician so I don’t know if that works.) With theatre what are the options? I think the solution is two-fold. Firstly ministers need t be empowered and equipped to support and discern gifting in theatre. They need to be aware of the power of theatre and to be honest about what is blessed and what is just good because they’ve learnt some lines. Secondly, actors, or people interested in drama, need to be pushed and challenged by models of good drama worship.

I think it may start by offering, at college, a seminar or session on good theatre practise so that those leaving into ministry can have some tools in their pocket to help and encourage good drama worship; to give them good resources and encouragement to support performers and challenge them. Secondly, I’d like to talk to Riding Lights about what they can do in terms of supporting ministries across the UK. They may not be interested but it’d be good to dream some big vision up with them and see what comes of it.

Sorry this isn’t a poetic end to a blog but I can’t compete with the marvellous God who created this light and this sky and who has walked me on a path of excitement and freshness. Having a time to look back over my journey with God is amazing and encouraging and to be released to get excited about the ministry ahead…God has plans! Great plans!!